The Cookout

Stan Zero · 12/7/21

Are there any secrets you have kept from your partner? Maybe you did something in the past, or something really embarrassing happened to you. Do you hold any secrets? Or does your partner have secrets that he/she won't reveal to you? I've done some dumb things in my life, but I'm pretty much an open book. Secrets I did have, I've told my past girlfriends about.

I don't expect any of us to share said secrets, just do you keep anything from your partner? Or do you both tell each other everything?

Dollene · 12/7/21

TELL THE TRUTH!!! I don’t think details are necessary. Give enough information to get the point across. The last thing you want is your partner being blind sided. If you’re that girl/guy doesn’t really matter what your dirty little secret is, a mature partner will be there.

Boss Hog · 12/7/21

Dollene said:
TELL THE TRUTH!!! I don’t think details are necessary. Give enough information to get the point across. The last thing you want is your partner being blind sided. If you’re that girl/guy doesn’t really matter what your dirty little secret is, a mature partner will be there.

This also a good policy because there is less to remember. If this was a couple of ex’s ago I would be able to fill this thread up with secrets but I‘m now reformed. I got tired of having to make lies ontop of lies to cover for lies I forgot about. I’m too old and tired of having my keys being thrown at me that shit hurts.

Dollene · 12/7/21

Boss Hog said:
This also a good policy because there is less to remember. If this was a couple of ex’s ago I would be able to fill this thread up with secrets but I‘m now reformed. I got tired of having to make lies ontop of lies to cover for lies I forgot about. I’m too old and tired of having my keys being thrown at me that ish hurts.

Hard lesson to learn but I’m happy you got it😆

Troy · 12/7/21

Stan Zero said:
Are there any secrets you have kept from your partner? Maybe you did something in the past, or something really embarrassing happened to you. Do you hold any secrets? Or does your partner have secrets that he/she won't reveal to you? I've done some dumb things in my life, but I'm pretty much an open book. Secrets I did have, I've told my past girlfriends about.

I don't expect any of us to share said secrets, just do you keep anything from your partner? Or do you both tell each other everything?

I’m leaving this one alone. This is how you get caught up.

Boss Hog · 12/7/21

Dollene said:
Hard lesson to learn but I’m happy you got it😆

I’m an old dog so it’s hard for me to learn new tricks but I usually get it after stumbling a few times.

Dollene · 12/7/21

Boss Hog said:
I’m an old dog so it’s hard for me to learn new tricks but I usually get it after stumbling a few times.

On the other hand some secrets will get you killed so tread lightly.

I now have AIDS because my spouse was too chicken shit to tell me they are HIV positive.

I ruined your life with child support and this ain’t your kid

I was born a man…

Jay · 12/7/21

Dollene said:
On the other hand some secrets will get you killed so tread lightly.

I now have AIDS because my spouse was too chicken ish to tell me they are HIV positive.

I ruined your life with child support and this ain’t your kid

I was born a man…

Are these examples or what actually happened to you?

Dollene · 12/7/21

Jay said:
Are these examples or what actually happened to you?

Just examples

Jay · 12/7/21

Dollene said:
Just examples

Oh I was like oh snap you got aids, got your ex paying for a child that aint his, and you’re a transsexual.

Dollene · 12/7/21

Jay said:
Oh I was like oh snap you got aids, got your ex paying for a child that aint his, and you’re a transsexual.

That would be all bad lmbo

Jay · 12/7/21

Dollene said:
That would be all bad lmbo

I was like oh snap this thread just got wild.

Bruh Man · 12/7/21

My dad had a secret whole other family that shit was wild. Personally I don’t keep secrets because I’m not good at that shit. My moms would always say whatever was on her mind and I picked it up. It was never sassy but she never backed down and would ride for her fam at all costs. Once we found out my dad was hoeing we left and I was with my mom and my dad wrote us off and fucked with his first family.

Dollene · 12/7/21

If nothing else your father taught you the dangers of dishonesty. Parents want their children to out perform them. Sounds like you’re on the right track.

sourgrapes · 12/8/21

From exes in my earlier years, absolutly! I wasn't expecting anything long-term nor had any direction for myself at the time. I wasn't going to risk everything about me being let out when he decides he is bored with me or something.

Goldilocks · 12/10/21

No one needs to know everything.

Jay · 12/10/21

Goldilocks said:
No one needs to know everything.

Yes it kinda messes up the mystic. There should always be something more too you.

Stan Zero · 12/10/21

Dollene said:
TELL THE TRUTH!!! I don’t think details are necessary. Give enough information to get the point across. The last thing you want is your partner being blind sided. If you’re that girl/guy doesn’t really matter what your dirty little secret is, a mature partner will be there.

Truth right there. As well, not telling them now, and them hearing about it later, could cause further trust issues, so yeah, I gotta spill my shit before I go into a relationship. I expect the same from her as well, at least not right away, but before anything serious like marriage comes about.

Boss Hog said:
This also a good policy because there is less to remember. If this was a couple of ex’s ago I would be able to fill this thread up with secrets but I‘m now reformed. I got tired of having to make lies ontop of lies to cover for lies I forgot about. I’m too old and tired of having my keys being thrown at me that ish hurts.

Yeah, lying just causes too many problems, and then you start to forget what you lied about. The worry washes away when you reveal the secrets I think. It just becomes too much. I know, I have family and friends who are notorious for stuff like this. It just causes more issues.

Bruh Man said:
My dad had a secret whole other family that ish was wild. Personally I don’t keep secrets because I’m not good at that ish. My moms would always say whatever was on her mind and I picked it up. It was never sassy but she never backed down and would ride for her fam at all costs. Once we found out my dad was hoeing we left and I was with my mom and my dad wrote us off and f**ked with his first family.

Damn, sorry to hear that. I can barely live one life, could only imagine trying to handle two families. Sorry to hear he stuck with his first family. It's surprising how many people live double lives like that, having more than one family.

I am not good at lying either. I guess I have a tell that people catch on to.

sourgrapes said:
From exes in my earlier years, absolutly! I wasn't expecting anything long-term nor had any direction for myself at the time. I wasn't going to risk everything about me being let out when he decides he is bored with me or something.

Yeah I told all my secrets to my exes, at least when I got comfortable enough with them. I think there's a time to tell them, but I don't think I'd do it too early either. I've dated women before where we lasted a couple weeks to a couple months, and I usually wait on spilling my past to a girlfriend. I want to be sure we're both comfortable enough to tell each other everything.

Goldilocks said:
No one needs to know everything.

Jay said:
Yes it kinda messes up the mystic. There should always be something more too you.

I get that. I do have some smaller secrets my past girlfriends never got, but the ones I dated for a while, I always spilled the darkest secrets, and a lot of the embarrassing ones. But Idk, I kinda like keeping some of my secrets and stories to tell later. So I guess that's where the mystic side of it comes in.

Blackgravity · 12/10/21

This ngga collecting blackmail material...

sourgrapes · 12/11/21

Stan Zero said:
Yeah I told all my secrets to my exes, at least when I got comfortable enough with them. I think there's a time to tell them, but I don't think I'd do it too early either. I've dated women before where we lasted a couple weeks to a couple months, and I usually wait on spilling my past to a girlfriend. I want to be sure we're both comfortable enough to tell each other everything.

Exactly. You don't want to risk stuff if you don't have to. I think both people should do this in a relationship. Be open and honest but until full commitment is on the table and you both feel like it will be a lasting relationship, no need to bring up secrets or issues of the past.

georgiaclay2022 · 12/11/21

There are secrets and then there are SECRETS… Yeah I’ve had stuff I never shared. Never will. Taking that info with me to the grave. However, I never kept info to myself that could have impacted my spouse when I had one…🤷🏾

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