One of the biggest failures these days is not preparing children for today's racism from their classmates and peers.
A generation ago, child suicide was extremely rare in the black community. Now it happens more often and I think we can identify a few reasons.
First, black children are bullied. The suicides tend to happen when the child is in an all white or predominantly white school and town. Children naturally want to fit in. A generation ago and prior, you knew early on white people ain't sh*t. You were on your Ps and Q's. Also, you were able to 'handle it' back then. You were pretty much excused from a fight if you were called a n*gger. These days the white folks are slick and changed it to 'who ever hit first' is suspended. Enforcement is the key, they will suspend the person calling another person a gay slur or a Jewish slur even if the other person hit them first, but not if its 'n*gger'.
We have no fathers in the home. Mothers naturally want their child to have a good childhood so will not discuss the realities. These days there is less masculinity in the adolescent males and teenagers. Sorry, its my observation. They get bullied easier.
It's much harder on girls. Boys can be loners and be okay, girls have a much stronger need to be part of a group. The parent(s) but usually parent (mom) don't prepare girls and it gets bad. It's very common for biracial girls and black girls to get ran through sexually in these white HS and towns. They want to fit it in, and want to be accepted so they will let white boys smash them in order to be accepted. Yes, it sounds effed up but you get the idea. I've seen or heard it happen. I knew a black girl who was adopted by a German couple. She had lifelong trauma from 5 boys running a train on her and then telling to bounce and talked about it to everyone at school.
I have a friend from Chicago and they went to a white HS. One of his classmates, biracial black girl was all into white boys. Got ran the f*ck through so badly, she moved to a new city, purged her social media and only dated black guys after that.
There was a story of a heavyset black boy being called N bombs and made to drink piss of his white bullies in a sleep over. Another story of a young black boy committing suicide from constant bullying. Those 2 stories had one thing in common. Single parent mom. Our single moms generally do a fantastic job. But you need both. No father is going to let his son be bullied like that.
Solutions?
Start telling the kids the realities. Yes, white kids are sometimes going to try and bully you or call you racial slurs.
I don't have kids but if I did, my kids, boy or girl, is going to be taking self defense classes from about 7 to 9 or 10 years old minimum. Self defense teaches discipline and control but most of all you will only bully my kid once. My parents had a rule for my brothers and I in fighting at school, etc. You won't get in trouble if its one of three scenarios.
1. They hit you first or were violating your personal space first.
2. You are protecting a family member.
3. You are protecting someone bullied and/or can't defend themselves (boy hitting a girl, older kid, hitting a young kid).
I was a nerd as you can imagine haha...so I only got it in a couple times, but they knew right away I don't bully. A white kid called me out my name and pushed me and I socked him. The principal wanted to suspend me. My parents came to the school, my dad told the principal that you do whatever your rules say but RCNAL followed my rule and if that kid does it again, he will do it again. The white parents were talking about suing for the hospital bill (bloody nose, emergency room) and my dad said 'Where did he learn to call black people the n word? From home?' and that was that.
I have long been meaning to take an MMA class. Learn basic moves on restraining a person and hitting back. A brotha I know taught Krav Maga and I took some lessons with him but not long enough to get proficient. But its on my 'to do' list to take some sort of self defense class seriously. Just enough for the average encounter I'm not tryna be MMA champion. Too old for that, got a bad knee, etc. haha
When I was in Cali I had an attorney on retainer. A family I was very close to, their niece is a criminal attorney in south Central LA. I saw her at family functions, etc. I contacted her through her pops about what I wanted. I told her, tell me an amount that I would need as a retainer to get you to go to a jail any hour of the night or day? It wasn't much actually but I got a 'homie' discount. But I paid a little more because I said I wanted to make sure. She asked her pops why I needed it because I wasn't about that life. He told her why. Cops arrest you for BS reasons, or you get into an encounter. I wanted to be able to call an attorney right away. I think every black adult should find such a person.
Lastly, know what to do BEFORE the encounter happens. What happens 99% of the time is we are so surprised, shocked, angry, etc, in a random encounter we start doing the 'What are you doing, blah blah blah' thing. You have all seen videos of us reacting all kinds of ways. At least have a plan. Yes, it may not work out perfectly, but think of likely scenarios and what you should be doing. Maybe recording, defensive posture, calling 911, whatever.
Remember, the white narrative will always be the one the cops and the media will go to. You will need proof otherwise.
