The Streets

As long as White supremacy exists we'll have no peace. Everyone needs to be responsible when it comes to procreation but It's called each one teach one or teach ten if you can that's the only way to raise the race out of the situation we see ourselves in. If we all act as individuals we'll continue down the same path towards extinction. He's not saying be a father he's talking about mentoring and no one should take issue with that. It does take a village and white supremacy will find you eventually no matter where you run to on this planet.

I have six biological children 4 have gone to college 2 have taken up trades all successful and I still took time to mentor those that weren't mine thise that I mentored have gone on to be productive in their endeavors. I'm by no means wealthy and I've found the time and money to do what needs to be done. No one is forcing you to do anything these children never asked to be here but once they're here they need guidance. We have to let these young men know that these streets are not the way we have to let these young ladies know that having multiple children isn't the way our young people are smart and intelligent in most cases and deserve better than they've gotten from Black Men and Black Women at the end of the generation we're all accountable. Blaming Black Women for all of the issues doesn't work. Enjoy your success though such as it is and your false sense of peace while we're really at war. There's no shame in being a successful person just like there's no shame in caring for my people......so my question to you is what and how do you propose to hold these single mothers accountable?

Umar is wrong on so many things. What's new?

Umar is well intentioned regarding our community and his message only upsets those that identify with a specific criticism or condemnation in the message.

So many different types of cases. I'm going to address absentee fathers of their children. This is not all cases, but from what I've seen. Two main types. The word 'main' is key. Others may disagree and I'm always open to being corrected (stop rolling your eyes, I am. lol)

Either, the woman knowingly got pregnant to a man she had very good reason to believe he would not stick around. Especially a guy with a bit of promise to him. Sometimes its trying to keep a guy from leaving so to trap him. Sometimes its she doesn't care, the guy is a pookie but he's tall, good dick, and if she gets pregnant, maybe he'll stick around, maybe not, but her kids will be 'cute' . There are other reasons as well. These guys aren't sticking around for the long term. They may stay around till the kid is born, till 1 or 2 but they aren't sticking around at all. She may be able to get some child support out of him, maybe. And if she does, he's angry and bitter and don't want a thing to do with the child.

Or she got pregnant by a guy that wants to be in the kids life. He doesn't like her or love her like that. It happened but he's gonna do the right thing and be involved in the kids life. She wants him to marry her. He doesn't like her like that. He helped financially the whole time. She knows with a kid, she's likely not going to find a good guy. So, she's betting on him. He ain't tryna wifey her, but he will be a father to the child. He tries. He also got a new girlfriend. She is pissed and to punish him denies him access to the child. All he can do is pay child support and keep it moving. He tries to get visitation rights. She holds the cards in the court system. She punishes him and the child. She makes sure he can't see the child, later on when the child asks about 'daddy', he gets 'That n*gga ain't about sh*t, he left us to fend for ourselves"

I have seen plenty of single moms where the father is involved. He may not be in the house but he's part of their lives, he visits, they get to stay with him in the summer, school vacation. Maybe alternate holidays. He has a new wife or gf and the mother doesn't like her but is thinking of the best interest of the child. From my observance, that situation is typically when the mother and father of the child are both from decent families, working class or middle class. Divorced maybe, or she got pregnant when they were 'kids', young, 18 or 19, thought they were in love and by 22 or 23 figured out they are not meant for each other. But share a child.

....all that being said, I'm not letting anyone shame me in to dating anyone. Miss me on all that. I'll keep it moving.

I get it. Dr. Umar wants black love, black families. We all do. But marriage in America for any man of means is not a good deal. You better choose right. It's a financial and emotional life or death situation.

And to show you how some, not all but some sisters are, some, for years black women said Oprah was smart for not marrying or she'd lose half that billions.

RCNAL said:

....all that being said, I'm not letting anyone shame me in to dating anyone. Miss me on all that. I'll keep it moving.

I get it. Dr. Umar wants black love, black families. We all do. But marriage in America for any man of means is not a good deal. You better choose right. It's a financial and emotional life or death situation.

And to show you how some, not all but some sisters are, some, for years black women said Oprah was smart for not marrying or she'd lose half that billions.

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Where did he say you all should date single Black mothers?

B1 rebel 365 said:

Umar is well intentioned regarding our community and his message only upsets those that identify with a specific criticism or condemnation in the message.

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At this point Umar has fallen down on the list of B1 folks I go to for information. That never ending school fiasco is why.

MR-D-ROB said:

I've always said I don't have anything against sisters.
And I'll do what I can to help them if I'm able.

I used to try to date black women but they wanted what they wanted. That wasn't me. I don't hold any grudge about that. If they hadn't turned me away I would not have met my wife. So I just feel that is how it was meant to be. And I'm thankful for it.

However, it would be a bit of a reach now that I'm 14 years into a successful government career to ask me to move into the hood again. It would be a stretch to even ask me to go back there or even associate with certain aspects of it.

I did everything I could to work my way up to get out of there. I hated getting harassed by police. Having to be bothered by junkies every time I go to the store. Hearing gunshots at night. Worrying about if police were going to try to frame you up on some bs charge because they lost their temper.

Asking me to go back to that. No way. Too traumatizing and I won't put my kids through that. I'm okay out in the suburbs.

If a single mother asked me to give advice to her son and help guide him away from bad influences then I would.

The thing is it would be ok them to ask for that help.

I'm otherwise quite busy focusing on my own daughters and family. But I won't turn down anyone that asked for my help.

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I wouldn't go over there either. That's asking for trouble. Jealous folks all around. Not saying everyone is.

Jay said:

He said that the professional class leaves and then doesn’t serve as role models for young Black boys…he didn’t say that the professional class needs to date single moms. If we in the professional class don’t work to make another professional class behind us then we are not building a community. If you get a good job, move to a white neighborhood, and never look to help other Black people you are no use to the race.

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This makes sense.

MR-D-ROB
I just read one of your previous comments about abolishing state welfare for black mothers and punitive FIVE year sentences for absent fathers and have to express that thank goodness you're never likely to be president and that you'd effortlessly surpass Biden in anti black hatred and cruelty.
The main beneficiaries of welfare are white women. The dominant group that you're so obsessed with being as close to as possible is the sole reason why black women are beleaguered in the sorry state of welfare dependency and non commitment from black men. The pavlovian dog and skinner rat paradigm is real and intentional. These black women didn't aspire to this wretched way of life but like any other group made bad decisions. They are stuck in that rut because selfish and cowardly black men would sooner abscond from the relationship than morally commit to their responsibility of parenting their offspring but the ultimate betrayal is when they run straight to the womb of WS to procreate with them and put them on a pedestal then vehemently disparage black women every opportunity but treat she wolves better than they'd ever dream of treating a black woman! Dr Amos Wilson often spoke about near do well blacks desperate to flee their community to nestle among whites that resent them. Gee, I wonder why we're in the stagnated state we're in. Black women didn't create their dilemma all by themselves. I wonder, would you have espoused the same contempt and vitriol during the height of slavery?!
I TOTALLY agree with every sentiment Umar expressed!

He literally said "role models" in the clip presented here. Role model does not mean stepdad. Some folks are getting triggered because of stuff that happened to them in their younger days. Our young men and boys need role models. The more the better. My son has his dad and his Elders looking after him. "Go back" does not mean move back there. There are many programs for successful Black men to be mentors, role models, etc. You can move out and still have a presence in the community. Let's get the chip off your respective shoulders and look out for the commUNITY. If you don't care about future generations say that and move on, but don't say he told men to marry/date single mothers when he didn't, especially in the clip presented here.

Also, he didn't say he's not going to hold single mothers accountable. He said he's not going to fault them more than the men who leave the Black community behind. Men are supposed to be leaders. If a man is whining or complaining about someone holding him accountable for being a leader, it's a big red flag for me. Yea, you didn't make the decisions to place that young boy in a single parent household. But guess what...? He's going to grow up and affect your children's lives... whether directly or indirectly.

There's power in the tongue. Mind your words folks.

Jay said:

No one has shown where he has advocated for us to look out for single moms. He is saying that Black men have a responsibility to look after the next generation of Black boys.

He is saying that even if the Boy’s father is not in the home it shouldn’t be an automatic path to the school to prison pipeline? Why? Because he is saying that there should be a community of Black men to guide him.

Some of y’all in here are being disingenuous and saying that he is telling us to shack up with these single moms and be step dad. I did not hear that at all. If you did, please point out where he said it.

In addition what’s wrong with Black men being the support for Black boys?

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If our Black Kings don't step up & show our Black Princes how to be Kings & our Black Queens step up & show our Black Princesses how to be Queens, the future they should have will NEVER be.
It truly does take a village & keep our tribes thriving for generations to come.
#WeMustDoTheWork