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What's the real problem with forgiveness?

Czharcus

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    It's the fact that we don't really know what it is so we misuse it, perpetuating the problem. Laquan McDonald's Great Uncle is in the news, misusing forgiveness and so perpetuating the suffering of many more. It is not our job to forgive anyone, but to forgive our own perceptions. Forgiveness is part of a self healing process that has nothing to do with anybody else.

    To use forgiveness in a way that makes others believe YOU even hold the power to forgive another simply ensures no one is healed. When we misuse forgiveness in this way, we are not only doing ourselves a disservice, we cut the legs out from under everyone involved, the community AND white people.


    But I forgive my thoughts that cause me to get angry at him for doing this. He is right, Rahm Emanuel is a victim of the system, BUT SO WAS HIS NEPHEW!

    He says he wants justice but it is not just to perpetuate the very system that isn't giving you justice by rewarding individuals who perpetuate the system. His words grouped with his actions, don't make logical sense. He's saying one thing but doing the EXACT OPPOSITE!

    I forgive my perception of him because I know he is intoxicated by his own ego. He does not know how deeply he is undermining himself. He is so in love with the IDENTITY of being the "holy man", the "bigger man" in front of everyone that he is stabbing himself and everybody else in the back!

    (Queed)
     

    TheHarmattan

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    Forgiveness to me has always been rooted in restitution, which derives from restoration. Different offenses have different levels of forgiveness.

    If I eat $1000 worth at a restaurant and when it comes time to pay, I forgot my wallet at home. My girl pulls out her Platinum card to pay. The owner isn't going to tell her that he cannot accept payment. He will forgive my debt and take my girl's card as restitution. I am forgiven.

    If you kill my favorite goat, you owe me three goats, then you are forgiven.

    If you sleep with my wife, what can you give me to restore what you have damaged? Your life is required according to The Bible, and then you are forgiven.

    Restitution allows me to be restored and then I am forgiven.
     

    Jay

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    It's the fact that we don't really know what it is so we misuse it, perpetuating the problem. Laquan McDonald's Great Uncle is in the news, misusing forgiveness and so perpetuating the suffering of many more. It is not our job to forgive anyone, but to forgive our own perceptions. Forgiveness is part of a self healing process that has nothing to do with anybody else.

    To use forgiveness in a way that makes others believe YOU even hold the power to forgive another simply ensures no one is healed. When we misuse forgiveness in this way, we are not only doing ourselves a disservice, we cut the legs out from under everyone involved, the community AND white people.


    But I forgive my thoughts that cause me to get angry at him for doing this. He is right, Rahm Emanuel is a victim of the system, BUT SO WAS HIS NEPHEW!

    He says he wants justice but it is not just to perpetuate the very system that isn't giving you justice by rewarding individuals who perpetuate the system. His words grouped with his actions, don't make logical sense. He's saying one thing but doing the EXACT OPPOSITE!

    I forgive my perception of him because I know he is intoxicated by his own ego. He does not know how deeply he is undermining himself. He is so in love with the IDENTITY of being the "holy man", the "bigger man" in front of everyone that he is stabbing himself and everybody else in the back!

    (Queed)
    Very great post and I feel as if what we have seen for so long is cowardice masquerading as forgiveness.

    This is a culture from people who have been wronged without recourse, too afraid to stand up and so they use forgiveness as a coping mechanism.

    For the first generation, this was a reaction to an external force. For subsequent generations, it was their life, they were always told to forgive and they even started to believe it was the high road.

    Like you so eloquently said, yes Rahm was in a system he didn’t build but how did he fall victim to it when he perpetuated it? He wasn’t a victim, he was a willful participant.

    The uncle is a coward and instead of staunchly defending his family’s right to live,
    he sold out and defended a man who wanted to deny his family justice.

    Look at the coons.
     

    sourgrapes

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    Forgiveness is a powerful thing and I think people overlook that forgiving someone else of their wrong-doing is actually more beneficial for the person who was hurt, betrayed, etc. than the actual person who is being forgiven. I know when I hold unforgiveness in my heart, it turns me cold and I carry that cold into the world and it causes more problems than good not just for myself but everyone around me. It is kind of like how charity and kind acts are contagious. If more people were able to forgive, more people would be better off in life.

    When it comes down to it, a lot of people don't deserve to be forgiven for the things they have done but the people who were wronged deserve to move on and piece their lives back together. Life is a mess, people cause issues, and a lot of problems will never be fixed or resolved. That is just the reality of it.

    I'm coming from a feminine perspective though and I understand for men, righting wrongs is held to a higher standard.
     

    Jay

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    Forgiveness is a powerful thing and I think people overlook that forgiving someone else of their wrong-doing is actually more beneficial for the person who was hurt, betrayed, etc. than the actual person who is being forgiven. I know when I hold unforgiveness in my heart, it turns me cold and I carry that cold into the world and it causes more problems than good not just for myself but everyone around me. It is kind of like how charity and kind acts are contagious. If more people were able to forgive, more people would be better off in life.

    When it comes down to it, a lot of people don't deserve to be forgiven for the things they have done but the people who were wronged deserve to move on and piece their lives back together. Life is a mess, people cause issues, and a lot of problems will never be fixed or resolved. That is just the reality of it.

    I'm coming from a feminine perspective though and I understand for men, righting wrongs is held to a higher standard.
    Sometimes when someone wrongs you, they need to die not be forgiven.
     

    Czharcus

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    Forgiveness is a powerful thing and I think people overlook that forgiving someone else of their wrong-doing is actually more beneficial for the person who was hurt, betrayed, etc. than the actual person who is being forgiven.
    Exactly why it does not need to be publicized. We have to watch our reasoning for publicizing our forgiveness. It may only be so people look at us a certain way which isn't true forgiveness because it is not based in authenticity, it's based in manipulation to get an egoic outcome.
    I know when I hold unforgiveness in my heart, it turns me cold and I carry that cold into the world and it causes more problems than good not just for myself but everyone around me. It is kind of like how charity and kind acts are contagious. If more people were able to forgive, more people would be better off in life.
    It is this way because we are One entity embodying billions+ forms all at the same time. So to hold unforgiveness towards someone else is literally the same thing as holding unforgiveness towards yourself. Forgiveness for the other is forgiveness for self. Harm to the other is harm to self. Likewise, love for the other is love for self. It's the brilliance of creation.
    When it comes down to it, a lot of people don't deserve to be forgiven for the things they have done but the people who were wronged deserve to move on and piece their lives back together.
    If a lot of people not deserving forgiveness is true in your mind for others, it will be true in your mind for you. It will inevitably cause you to undermine yourself because we cannot control what our minds will count as unforgivable. Conditioning and circumstance does that automatically. Our brains are computers with built in and created "if then" statements that are always working whether we are conscious of them or not.
    Life is a mess, people cause issues, and a lot of problems will never be fixed or resolved. That is just the reality of it.
    Because we are One, it is already fated that EVERY problem is solved.
    I'm coming from a feminine perspective though and I understand for men, righting wrongs is held to a higher standard.
    I love and appreciate your engagement.



    I understand I am literally talking to my selves so there is no arrogance in my words (because that would be ridiculous) but I'm speaking from the logic of Truth, Oneness. Ultimately, our "human egos/identities" do not have the ability to forgive the other, we can only recognize it's already done. That recognition is self forgiveness, the only forgiveness that exists because we are One entity. As one entity, we would never knowingly hurt our Self so when we do, forgiveness is the recognition that it was only a mistake in identity. This ensures we don't hold it against ourselves when we inevitably make the same mistake. Guilt is the source of our problems, forgiveness dissolves guilt.
     

    Jay

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    Too late! lol. Forgiveness is already done before we even think about it.
    Not in my reality frame.

    You make a lot of really good salient points that I love but Black people have also been talking about metaphysical shit in the slave prisons, then on the boat, then on the plantation, etc and neglecting the 3 dimensions they can actually manipulate. We knew about the metaphysical 5k year ago, the people that are winning now are just now figuring it out through quantum physics. Obviously it’s important but what’s directly in front of of you is even more important.
     

    Czharcus

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    Not in my reality frame.

    You make a lot of really good salient points that I love but Black people have also been talking about metaphysical ish in the slave prisons, then on the boat, then on the plantation, etc and neglecting the 3 dimensions they can actually manipulate. We knew about the metaphysical 5k year ago, the people that are winning now are just now figuring it out through quantum physics. Obviously it’s important but what’s directly in front of of you is even more important.
    The metaphysics determine what happens in the 3 dimensions. We cannot actually fundamentally change what happens in the 3 dimensions without going through the metaphysics. The best we can do is rearrange the deck chairs on the Titanic. The idea of "criminal justice reform" comes to mind (the 3D). The problem with criminal justice reform in the 3D is the fundamental way we are approaching criminal justice cannot produce justice no matter how we reform it. We can't possibly know that without understanding the metaphysics involved (well, we can know it intuitively without understanding the metaphysics of course).

    The people that are "winning" right now are actually "losing". You literally just said that when you said "we knew about the metaphysical 5K year ago, the people that are winning now are just now figuring it out…" The real world is "happening" in the metaphysical, everything else is an illusion.

    I'm sure the issue many people in the "metaphysical community" (ridiculous term) past and present face is how do you convince people that what they're seeing with their eyes is less significant than what they are not? Riddle me that, Batman.🤯
     

    Jay

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    The metaphysics determine what happens in the 3 dimensions. We cannot actually fundamentally change what happens in the 3 dimensions without going through the metaphysics. The best we can do is rearrange the deck chairs on the Titanic. The idea of "criminal justice reform" comes to mind (the 3D). The problem with criminal justice reform in the 3D is the fundamental way we are approaching criminal justice cannot produce justice no matter how we reform it. We can't possibly know that without understanding the metaphysics involved (well, we can know it intuitively without understanding the metaphysics of course).

    The people that are "winning" right now are actually "losing". You literally just said that when you said "we knew about the metaphysical 5K year ago, the people that are winning now are just now figuring it out…" The real world is "happening" in the metaphysical, everything else is an illusion.

    I'm sure the issue many people in the "metaphysical community" (ridiculous term) past and present face is how do you convince people that what they're seeing with their eyes is less significant than what they are not? Riddle me that, Batman.🤯
    All that sounds good but your people are the global underclass...so it sounds righteous but it doesn't help. Metaphysical talk ain't gonna help us build shelter and mind resources. That's first world privilege talk.
     

    Czharcus

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    All that sounds good but your people are the global underclass...so it sounds righteous but it doesn't help. Metaphysical talk ain't gonna help us build shelter and mind resources. That's first world privilege talk.
    You're absolutely right. That's why the suffering of the moment must happen because it's the only thing that can happen. Thus you have people in the "metaphysical community" ignoring the 3D. They know how to stop the suffering but also know nobody's gonna listen to them because they literally can't. In their current circumstance, which only allows a certain level of consciousness, they are not able to make any sense of metaphysics. The metaphysics simply does not allow for them to make a different choice. That recognition is forgiveness. And it was already done before you thought about it. You are merely correcting your own perception to align with what's true (Reality).

    And so ultimately, we have to conclude: nothing "wrong" is happening on the planet ANYWHERE, EVER. Everything has to play out exactly how it is playing out. There is literally nothing to do, nothing to "fix" but our own perception.


    Naturally, those that do know what's going on are going to try and minimize suffering on the microscale because they know it's needless, but on the macro scale, was going to happen is going to happen because it has to, there is no alternative. It's all for the best anyway so pfft…
     

    sourgrapes

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    Exactly why it does not need to be publicized. We have to watch our reasoning for publicizing our forgiveness. It may only be so people look at us a certain way which isn't true forgiveness because it is not based in authenticity, it's based in manipulation to get an egoic outcome.

    It is this way because we are One entity embodying billions+ forms all at the same time. So to hold unforgiveness towards someone else is literally the same thing as holding unforgiveness towards yourself. Forgiveness for the other is forgiveness for self. Harm to the other is harm to self. Likewise, love for the other is love for self. It's the brilliance of creation.

    If a lot of people not deserving forgiveness is true in your mind for others, it will be true in your mind for you. It will inevitably cause you to undermine yourself because we cannot control what our minds will count as unforgivable. Conditioning and circumstance does that automatically. Our brains are computers with built in and created "if then" statements that are always working whether we are conscious of them or not.

    Because we are One, it is already fated that EVERY problem is solved.

    I love and appreciate your engagement.



    I understand I am literally talking to my selves so there is no arrogance in my words (because that would be ridiculous) but I'm speaking from the logic of Truth, Oneness. Ultimately, our "human egos/identities" do not have the ability to forgive the other, we can only recognize it's already done. That recognition is self forgiveness, the only forgiveness that exists because we are One entity. As one entity, we would never knowingly hurt our Self so when we do, forgiveness is the recognition that it was only a mistake in identity. This ensures we don't hold it against ourselves when we inevitably make the same mistake. Guilt is the source of our problems, forgiveness dissolves guilt.
    I do think everything is connected on some level. One individual to another, an individual to an animal, an animal to a plant, etc. and that is likely why we become so emotional over different things and often find ourselves in a place where reasoning with certain actions without fear or anger is viewed as a bad thing. Everyone's level of passion is different and everyone's approach to things like forgiveness, love, charity, etc. are different in some ways.

    I just always felt forgiveness was the way to go for oneself because I guess I was raised this way. My mother has always been a very forgiving person. She would take her time to be angry, sad, hurt, and so on but once she has grieved the experience, she is able to let it go. She always told me "Let go and let God" and I think this was her way of saying let God deal with their punishment and you focus on living your best life.