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Do you date within your own race(s)?

sourgrapes

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I am curious.

I am open to whatever but there needs to be understanding because different races and cultures have different experiences. We all have our own struggles in society, some of us have it worse off than others though depending on what is being compared and contrasted. It can get messy being in a mixed-race relationship, especially when kids enter the picture.

I have been judged for it both ways. Judged for dating white and Latino men, judged for dating black men. I feel like I can't win these days. People assume I will get mistreated if I am with a black man but t, also that I will be used as a token or trophy if I am with another race (especially if it is a white man). I have no issue with people dating whoever they are attracted to but you have to be respectful of yourself.
 

Invincible1914

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I am curious.

I am open to whatever but there needs to be understanding because different races and cultures have different experiences. We all have our own struggles in society, some of us have it worse off than others though depending on what is being compared and contrasted. It can get messy being in a mixed-race relationship, especially when kids enter the picture.

I have been judged for it both ways. Judged for dating white and Latino men, judged for dating black men. I feel like I can't win these days. People assume I will get mistreated if I am with a black man but t, also that I will be used as a token or trophy if I am with another race (especially if it is a white man). I have no issue with people dating whoever they are attracted to but you have to be respectful of yourself.
The real question is how do feel about what they are calling “bed-wenching”?
 

Troy

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    I only like my Black American sistas, it just seems easier. I dont have to explain my culture to her she gets it. She knows who Martin is, watched Jamie Foxx Show, I dont have to explain the police to her, its just much easier. No shade for any other women but Im all about my chocolate.
     

    Real One

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    I date black women, but I wouldn't say no to dating a white woman or any other race. As long as we click, I think that's all that matters. I think we've come a long way, to where it's acceptable to date whoever you want to date. Yeah there are the idiots out there who think it's wrong to date certain races. I'll date whoever I want to date.
     

    sourgrapes

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    The real question is how do feel about what they are calling “bed-wenching”?
    I feel like men or women who live in the past will only hurt their future. I am not going to ignore the troubles and issues of the past and where we came from but I am not going to assume that all white men are out to use me like a piece of meat. There are certainly some out there with fetishes and it is disturbing but you can easily avoid these types of guys.

    It is easier for a lot of reasons to date your own race and those who choose to only do so, I would not call them racist. It makes sense from a cultural standpoint. At the end of the day, we can't help who we are attracted to. I find a lot of different men attractive for different reasons.
     

    Invincible1914

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    I feel like men or women who live in the past will only hurt their future. I am not going to ignore the troubles and issues of the past and where we came from but I am not going to assume that all white men are out to use me like a piece of meat. There are certainly some out there with fetishes and it is disturbing but you can easily avoid these types of guys.

    It is easier for a lot of reasons to date your own race and those who choose to only do so, I would not call them racist. It makes sense from a cultural standpoint. At the end of the day, we can't help who we are attracted to. I find a lot of different men attractive for different reasons.
    I think we should be with the person who makes us happy regardless of skin color. There’s nothing good about limiting your options and being stuck in a bad relationship living out somebody else’s narrative. But there is a contingent of black women who reached a level of “success” and promoting this idea that they are no longer dating black men.
     

    Jay

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    I think we should be with the person who makes us happy regardless of skin color. There’s nothing good about limiting your options and being stuck in a bad relationship living out somebody else’s narrative. But there is a contingent of black women who reached a level of “success” and promoting this idea that they are no longer dating black men.

    Yes, while I love @sourgrapes answer, it doesn't touch on the coon contingent or divestors who venerate white men.
     

    sourgrapes

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    Yes, while I love @sourgrapes answer, it doesn't touch on the coon contingent or divestors who venerate white men.
    Do you mean black women who feel they are entitled to date white men because of their success? That is a thing? I honestly didn't know about this if this is what you meant.
     

    Jay

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    Do you mean black women who feel they are entitled to date white men because of their success? That is a thing? I honestly didn't know about this if this is what you meant.
    No, Black women who think that White men are better than Black men.
     

    sourgrapes

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    No, Black women who think that White men are better than Black men.
    Oh right, I understand. Yeah, this is a problem that I think stems back to the fracturing of the black family unit in America. Black men were replaced with the welfare state so a lot of black women view them as disposable so if they do become successful, there is likely a preference for other races. I don't know how this issue gets corrected. It has bothered me for a while now. No one seems to address the issue either.
     

    Troy

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    Oh right, I understand. Yeah, this is a problem that I think stems back to the fracturing of the black family unit in America. Black men were replaced with the welfare state so a lot of black women view them as disposable so if they do become successful, there is likely a preference for other races. I don't know how this issue gets corrected. It has bothered me for a while now. No one seems to address the issue either.
    its coonery
     

    Rollie Forbes

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    I’m black and have only dated black women. I’m from the deepest south country parts of Mississippi If that helps.
    Man, we might be cousins! My people are in Lawrence County, Hattiesburg, & Gulfport. What part of the 'Sip are you from?
     
    D

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    Don't worry about what other people think. Date who you want. Do what makes you happy.
    How is life in Texas? I saw a video of a Black woman who was crying about how in a particular Texas town, a Mexican owned business invited her in for an interview. And a Latina woman came in late but got the job over her although she was on time. I bet her thoughts regarding the minorities coming together went away after that experience.
     
    D

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    I wouldn't do it now. Back in the day, if she was cute, it didn't matter much, though my aunt would always say, "if you lie down with dogs, don't be surprised when you come up with fleas." She was the only one who tried to give me game on dating other races. Everybody else in the family had jokes but no real gems as to WHY it was important to not intermingle. At this point, I wouldn't even try to date other than Black, unless I just wanted to waste my time on crossing a chick off the list midway through the first date. As much as the "allies" tend to mean well, having to explain every single microaggression or pop culture reference seems to exhausting. Plus, I want my son to marry Black, so he can't see me doing anything that would be considered off code.
     
    D

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    I wouldn't do it now. Back in the day, if she was cute, it didn't matter much, though my aunt would always say, "if you lie down with dogs, don't be surprised when you come up with fleas." She was the only one who tried to give me game on dating other races. Everybody else in the family had jokes but no real gems as to WHY it was important to not intermingle. At this point, I wouldn't even try to date other than Black, unless I just wanted to waste my time on crossing a chick off the list midway through the first date. As much as the "allies" tend to mean well, having to explain every single microaggression or pop culture reference seems to exhausting. Plus, I want my son to marry Black, so he can't see me doing anything that would be considered off code.
    Great response. People from other races usually come from a different mindset than us.
     
    B
    Bmick#8
    the 90's had a lot of suburban Blacks thinking shit was sweet. Most of the people I knew had come from the same type of circumstance: grew up up in the hood, and halfway through middle school, our parents started getting money and moved us out the hood. Mixing wit the ofays held its trepidations at first, then it became almost natural to be at mixed parties, and smoking beezys and what have you. But the penalty for that kind of ignorance wasn't as stiff as it is now.
    D

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    I only date Black British women.
     
    B
    Bmick#8
    Patrice used to rave about the mixed women in Liverpool
    B
    B1 Ski-Kid
    I like the Manchester Sistas but I heard the Sistas in South London got some sass, which I like. I want to move to SL for Thornton Heath anyway since it's mostly Black over there.
    B
    B1 Ski-Kid
    Rarely ever saw any Black people or mixed in Liverpool, the last time I visited. It's about as Black as BlackPool (WhitePool).

    RCNAL

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    My preference physically is very dark, petite, cute sistas. It's not always what I was able to pull..lol. I've dated all kinds of women at least once. But sistas are my preference and a woman who is black American or black American culturally, because it's the one type I was dating most of my life since I figured out by 2nd grade maybe that girls didn't have 'cooties'. lol

    There is no having to explain things in movies, tv shows, or using slang they don't understand. But I wouldn't be opposed to a Canadian, British, African or Caribbean sista at all if we are on the same page.

    The one thing I have found from dating other women is my sense of humor. SIstas in America, know it, get it, even if they may not like my jokes. I've found non American women take obvious jokes literally. And it has caused minor issues at first. Music is another thing as well, most American black music is liked but sometimes it isn't.