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Do you think online dating has hurt our relationships?

sourgrapes

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I never took part in it. I never used any of the apps or even considered it. I have a lot of friends who have and do use and frequent these online dating apps, sites, etc. I feel like they are all struggling to find happiness and fulfillment in a relationship. Some are either in it just to get a sexual fix or they are looking for something more with dudes who are coasting in and out DMs. I feel like online dating is ruining people. Share your thoughts.
 

Sapphire

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    It makes people be stupid and greedy with their options. It has given women a leg up over men cause they suddenly have access to the top 10% (most wealthy, handsome, etc) of them so they get an ego about themselves. I think it has hurt us but not in ways we will even realize until time passes.
     

    sourgrapes

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    It makes people be stupid and greedy with their options. It has given women a leg up over men cause they suddenly have access to the top 10% (most wealthy, handsome, etc) of them so they get an ego about themselves. I think it has hurt us but not in ways we will even realize until time passes.
    I noticed this is more of an issue with white women though. This is why you always see them getting played on apps like Tinder. They look for those rich men and attractive men, not fact-checking anything. They are all so stupid.
     

    Mr. Chris

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    Online dating has "Hyper Incubated" instant communications between men and women where the "dating" portion of meeting people is minimized...

    For Example: If me and a woman met on Black Planet (not physically), and we have been video chatting with each other for 3 months to now arrange to meet, what is the purpose to "date" when the actual "dating" was actually the video chatting back and forth with one another.

    By the time the two people physically get together, the sexual intimacy will get going. Then the conversation of starting a relationship builds from that point.
     

    Tati 304

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    Online dating has "Hyper Incubated" instant communications between men and women where the "dating" portion of meeting people is minimized...

    For Example: If me and a woman met on Black Planet (not physically), and we have been video chatting with each other for 3 months to now arrange to meet, what is the purpose to "date" when the actual "dating" was actually the video chatting back and forth with one another.

    By the time the two people physically get together, the sexual intimacy will get going. Then the conversation of starting a relationship builds from that point.
    It all depends on how you use the time. If you’re having meaningful conversation over the internet then i don’t see the issue. It’s no different than talking over the phone from back in the days but now we can see each other’s faces.

    You can use that to build a bond and then still date when you meet physically. The thing as you said is that you build familiarity and then when you meet you want to get physical. I don’t see the issue.
     

    Mr. Chris

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    It all depends on how you use the time. If you’re having meaningful conversation over the internet then i don’t see the issue. It’s no different than talking over the phone from back in the days but now we can see each other’s faces.

    You can use that to build a bond and then still date when you meet physically. The thing as you said is that you build familiarity and then when you meet you want to get physical. I don’t see the issue.
    Overall, I don't have a problem with online dating, I would be hypocrite if I did.

    I will say this, If I am on a dating site to meet a sexy black woman, I want to get to know her, but I want to make sure that there is a sexual connection there as well simply because that is also important.

    Some women have a problem with that, others don't. So as a man (with good intentions), you have to be willing to be upfront and honest to what you are looking for in a woman, express that, then leave it up to her to see if she is willing to try to go in that same direction to form a relationship with that man.
     

    Mr. Chris

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    I think the issue comes down to people just on there to get in each other's pants or get bills paid. If you establish a relationship prior to meeting in person, it makes a big difference for sure.
    Two (or more) things can be true. I may want to get into a woman's panties, still date her, take her to lunch , dinner, establish a relationship with her, ect...
     

    Sapphire

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    Two (or more) things can be true. I may want to get into a woman's panties, still date her, take her to lunch , dinner, establish a relationship with her, ect...
    I am talking about just looking to get laid, not forming a relationship. There are people on those apps who put up a front just so they can get laid and then move on to the next one.
     

    Mr. Chris

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    I am talking about just looking to get laid, not forming a relationship. There are people on those apps who put up a front just so they can get laid and then move on to the next one.
    Oh most absolutely. Online dating has expanded the choice of woman (or man) people want to find.
     

    Boss Hog

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    I believe it's done serious damage, especially among Millenials. If it's not the stealthing, it's the messages left on Read, the superficial pickiness (which leads to catfishing), or unrealistic standards we've developed for each other.
    All of that happens in real life too which why the PUA industry is so successful.
     

    Sapphire

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    unrealistic standards
    Hollywood, music videos, porn, and even video games have been doing this for us before dating apps and sites were even a thing but you are right. It doesn't help. So many women use filters and men lie about their status. It is like a bunch of fake people trying to pretend to be something they are not to get someone who they believe to be something they ain't.
     

    Devin

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    I have considered using dating apps and websites in the past, but I ended up deciding against it. I don't necessarily believe that dating applications are hurting relationships, I do however believe technology as a whole is hurting relationships. Years ago before technology was big, people would always hang out and physically make new friends and relationships. With technological advancements, people hardly ever leave their house and don't speak face to face anymore. With this being said, most friendships and relationships aren't authentic anymore but rather virtual. I believe technology is why divorce rates across the world are so high, you meet someone online and they aren't who you expect them to be.
     

    cjg

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    Online dating is a waste of time. If a man is interested in you he will approach you.
    I don't agree Sis. Many people nowadays have met their spouse online. Been married 12 yrs. Ppl vibe to different mediums, ... Some dudes or females are shy, and that's their medium. Just all depends, but don't discount the online.. Finding out a way to weed out the bull, that's another art
     

    Queen ChaCha

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    Those are rare occasions. In reality a man will approach you if he is interested. However people decide to link up that is them. Some people decide to settle and aren't really looking for real love and just make it work because they don't want to be alone. I won't consider online dating as a choice. It's just not for me and I'm not missing out on anything not doing it. I respect your response though.
     

    Troy

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    Online dating is a waste of time. If a man is interested in you he will approach you.
    Online dating gives you access to more men. You have a hire probability to find someone. But with the higher probability means more b niggas you have your deal with.
     

    Maxwell

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    I know for sure that it works for some people but it's not something that I have any kind of flair for because the very first time I gave it a try, I got a hooker when I was looking for a relationship. Most people online lie in their profile and it's a big turn off for me when we meet in person and your profile is different from what I get to see.
     

    Barida

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    There are a lot of fake profiles on these dating apps that make it very difficult to meet real people. People with emotions and feelings to find true love. Online dating is useless unless where we get to see within a couple of weeks of discussing. People depending mainly on finding love on the internet most times end up being disappointed.
     

    Queen ChaCha

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    Online dating gives you access to more men. You have a hire probability to find someone. But with the higher probability means more b niggas you have your deal with.
    It's more of that online because it requires no effort. You can be in your drawers and chat. It's a nothing burger all around.
     

    Queen ChaCha

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    There are a lot of fake profiles on these dating apps that make it very difficult to meet real people. People with emotions and feelings to find true love. Online dating is useless unless where we get to see within a couple of weeks of discussing. People depending mainly on finding love on the internet most times end up being disappointed.
    It's a breeding ground for scammers too. They train there and take money from a lot of lonely but willing people. It's not right but it is what it is.
     

    Queen ChaCha

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    There are a lot of fake profiles on these dating apps that make it very difficult to meet real people. People with emotions and feelings to find true love. Online dating is useless unless where we get to see within a couple of weeks of discussing. People depending mainly on finding love on the internet most times end up being disappointed.
    Well yes that too. It's sad to see that what some present online is different from what you see in real life.
     

    equis

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    Just like any tool, online dating could be used in productive way or destructive way. However, with the way the apps are designed it's not to maximize relationship building because then you'd find a good partner and leave the app. So these dating apps have become door dash style hook up apps and are even being marketed as such. The world of online dating is a case study in itself.
     

    Sovereign

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    Just like any tool, online dating could be used in productive way or destructive way. However, with the way the apps are designed it's not to maximize relationship building because then you'd find a good partner and leave the app. So these dating apps have become door dash style hook up apps and are even being marketed as such. The world of online dating is a case study in itself.
    Is it built for hook ups or is that when the people are looking for?
     

    equis

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    Is it built for hook ups or is that when the people are looking for?
    I think in it's Genesis it might've actually been built for relationships (this is of course coming from what I remember about Tinder in its infancy). But as it was being used more and more for just hookups, the creators geared it more for hookup culture and adapted it to suit it better.
     

    Maxwell

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    Just like any tool, online dating could be used in productive way or destructive way. However, with the way the apps are designed it's not to maximize relationship building because then you'd find a good partner and leave the app. So these dating apps have become door dash style hook up apps and are even being marketed as such. The world of online dating is a case study in itself.
    Everything is all about who's making use of it and for what purposes they are using it for. I have seen some people who are fortunate enough to meet good people through dating websites and end up with them for the rest of their lives. While there are some that turned it into a hooker section for their sex selling business.
     

    MarleyK20

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    After my divorce, I tried internet dating and it was the worst brief experience I ever had. If you want to hook up and have quick sex, it's for you. If you're looking for quality and substance, stay away! I like sitting in front of a man and watch his body language when I ask certain questions, how he engages, cell phone usage, etc. There is something you can glean from in-person dating you'll never get from an online app. I found the men on those sites treated women like video games. I found early it was a place for the thirsty and desperate and I opted out. I'd just assume be alone.

    The odds are stacked against any relationship seeker using dating apps. It's a waste of time. If folks can't get out and find ways to meet people in person, that's probably a huge red flag....
     

    sourgrapes

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    Just like any tool, online dating could be used in productive way or destructive way. However, with the way the apps are designed it's not to maximize relationship building because then you'd find a good partner and leave the app. So these dating apps have become door dash style hook up apps and are even being marketed as such. The world of online dating is a case study in itself.
    This is the best description of dating apps I have read. It really is the door dash of the dating world. It has brought hook-up culture to the mainstream and now we have both men and women just looking to knock boots and move on.
     

    chinwe

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    Online dating is one of the great innovations of the 20th century. I think it has given an opportunity for all sexes to have a larger pool to choose from when it comes to relationship. There will always be cons and pros, but I think the benefits outways the disadvantages. Most men know that getting a lady for a relationship is a numbers game, and ladies have the right of selection or rejection. Online dating only brings all the people closer and increases the odds for those that know how to market and sell themselves.
     

    Maxwell

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    I definitely think social media has hurt thr dating scene.
    There's no disputing that for me. A lot of people live fake lives on a high scale on social media and when you're trying to build your own life and relationship in your level, they make it very difficult for you with the kind of bad influence they have on one's partner.
     

    Heatice

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    I think the issue comes down to people just on there to get in each other's pants or get bills paid. If you establish a relationship prior to meeting in person, it makes a big difference for sure.
    Seriously!! I think that's exactly what most people use the platform now for. I keep wondering how it got that level where everyone is now obsessed with money that the common values our parents taught us doesn't have value any more. Some even exploit social media for fame with having their nude posted online.
     

    Sapphire

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    Seriously!! I think that's exactly what most people use the platform now for. I keep wondering how it got that level where everyone is now obsessed with money that the common values our parents taught us doesn't have value any more. Some even exploit social media for fame with having their nude posted online.
    The sad part is the younger girls of the next two generations are seeking nothing but money and sexualized attention. Girls as young as 8 years old are out there right now doing this. It is disturbing and dangerous!