The Cookout

[GwynShivers]

Any dude that is that lazy is weak. I'm raising my son to be a general of the house. He needs to know how to cook, clean, be domestic, etc and a woman coming into his life should want to take those things off his plate not be mandated. My mantra is if your woman has had a hard day why shouldn't you as the man cook her a hot meal? It shouldn't be one sided.

I taught my son & grandson how to cook, sew, wash clothes, make the bed & keep the house clean. They also know yard work, agricultural & maintenance. They're limited on car repair, but won't be stuck on the highway.

 

[Sapphire]

If you want to be a working woman, do you girl.
If you want to be a stay-at-home wifey, I feel that.

I think this thread addresses a good question that not many people want to talk about. I feel that if the man is the provider of all things financial, the woman's role is to take care of his needs. Keep the home clean. If there are kids, take the driver's seat with them. Make sure his life at home is as comfortable as possible and keep in good shape and health to please him. Don't degrade yourself but make sure he knows you appreciate him and what he does for you.

 

[GwynShivers]

Some women are now maintaining a home, cooking, working full time, caring for children, and managing the home. Some men are still working and taking out the trash talking about they tired… seems imbalanced… all because old society norms based on when women stayed at home. Something has to change!

I've always worked & still maintained my household. Changed my schedule to nights, to accommodate my family. Home by 2am, exercise, bathe & sleep. Up at 6am making breakfast & getting my eldest grandson ready for school. Walked him to school & sat in his classroom for awhile. Ran errands, payed bills & left instructions for my older children on the fridge. Picked up my grandson, assisted with homework & fed him a pre dinner snack.
My youngest daughter is usually coming in at that time, with her friends & reading her instructions. I'm leaving for work & she's taking all that day's meals out of the freezer, that I prepared for the week on my days off.
My eldest daughter made sure the house stayed in order & delegated who'd be doing what, in addition to my instructions. By that time, their Dad would be walking in from work, ready to sit down to dinner & everyone helped setting & clearing the table, as well as cleaning, drying & putting everything back in place.

 

[Devin]

This is an excellent question. I will say that I see a lot of lower-income families where the male and females have full-time jobs to support the family. However, if the male is able to support the entire family and pay the bills, I believe the female should tend to the house and children. If I'm paying the bills, I expect the house to be kept clean, the children to be fed, and I expect everything to be run in an orderly fashion. If I pay the bills, I don't expect you to mooch off of me and do absolutely nothing in return. If you're living in the house I'm paying for, I expect you to put forth the effort. I don't plan to pay all of the bills, then come home and have to clean, cook, and do everything else. That should already be done.

 

[GwynShivers]

This is an excellent question. I will say that I see a lot of lower-income families where the male and females have full-time jobs to support the family. However, if the male is able to support the entire family and pay the bills, I believe the female should tend to the house and children. If I'm paying the bills, I expect the house to be kept clean, the children to be fed, and I expect everything to be run in an orderly fashion. If I pay the bills, I don't expect you to mooch off of me and do absolutely nothing in return. If you're living in the house I'm paying for, I expect you to put forth the effort. I don't plan to pay all of the bills, then come home and have to clean, cook, and do everything else. That should already be done.

All my children are grown now, just me & the love of my life. That's exactly how it is. House clean, meal hot & ready, peaceful & drama free.
My husband does 12 hours of private security. He comes home to a loving, peaceful & drama free environment, daily.
When he's off, there’s breakfast in bed. Lunch & dinner may be as well. It's ALL about what he needs & desires.
When it's all said & done, I get ALL I wanted from the beginning, him. All the love, attention & adventure we both want soon follows.

 

[Devin]

All my children are grown now, just me & the love of my life. That's exactly how it is. House clean, meal hot & ready, peaceful & drama free.
My husband does 12 hours of private security. He comes home to a loving, peaceful & drama free environment, daily.
When he's off, there’s breakfast in bed. Lunch & dinner may be as well. It's ALL about what he needs & desires.
When it's all said & done, I get ALL I wanted from the beginning, him. All the love, attention & adventure we both want soon follows.

I absolutely love this! I'm glad things are going extremely well for you and your husband, it's a win-win situation for the both of you. I can only hope that I have a relationship like yours someday. Thank you for sharing this with us.

 

[GwynShivers]

I absolutely love this! I'm glad things are going extremely well for you and your husband, it's a win-win situation for the both of you. I can only hope that I have a relationship like yours someday. Thank you for sharing this with us.

No problem. We've been together longer than most. The thing for us is to give each other our best.

 

[TAILIANNA]

We’re in an age where women have found a new level of autonomy which has caused us to buck many traditional gender roles e.g. subordinance, domestic duties, child rearing, etc.

So what do you think a woman’s role is in the modern world where women have grown accustom to the autonomy but want to maintain the role of male as the main provider?

Do you return to the traditional gender roles or is it a hybrid?

Ladies, if the man is willing and able to pay all the bills and provide you a comfortable life would you be willing to forgo work out of the house to tend domestic duties, child rearing, etc? @sourgrapes @lexodyssey @Caprice @Ebonyjo @sunshinenmay25 @Cassandra113364 @Red Velvet @Tati 304
@Nicole0646_718 @Harlemhottie

Men, what would you require from your woman if you’re meeting 100% of the financial obligations? @The Haze Of Our Lives @HennyPapi @TheHarmattan @Deluge @De'Londa Brice @SnakeyG

This is a good debate i think it all comes down to what kind of person each is and their strengths and weaknesses. I like traditional guys and i like to cook clean doing beauty stuff etc while still running my own biz. I feel like men are better suited for the day by day grind taking care of bills food etc. and women are better at looking at the whole picture and making long term moves.

 

[Devin]

No problem. We've been together longer than most. The thing for us is to give each other our best.

And believe me when I tell that it's the main reason why you both have been where you are right now. If two parties gives their best in their relationship, they will always grow better and stronger.