The holidays are tough for me in my early 30s with no parents, division amongst siblings, and no family to take initiative to reach out and check on me. All of this while being a Mom and trying to create traditions for my own child. Can’t even listen to Christmas songs without feeling sad.
The Cookout
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Seasonal Depression
Hello fam. Sorry to hear your own family doesn’t even check to see how you are doing. I can at least ask. How are you doing at the moment? Def cherish your kid and y’all build memories together. 😀
I’m doing fine. I miss my parents, especially my mom terribly. Hanging in there.
D
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Try to focus on creating your own traditions, for your baby's sakes. Easier said than done, I know.
And if you can, reach out to those who you are close to and spend time with them throughout the season to maintain a sense of connection.
My mom died 5 years ago and it's a struggle to get together without her. They make all of my family sad still. Usually what we've started to do is get together after the actual holiday and sort of make it like an impromptu family dinner. It lets us be together while still respecting that we're all still grieving the loss.
Sending you so much love and strength this holiday season.
And if you can, reach out to those who you are close to and spend time with them throughout the season to maintain a sense of connection.
My mom died 5 years ago and it's a struggle to get together without her. They make all of my family sad still. Usually what we've started to do is get together after the actual holiday and sort of make it like an impromptu family dinner. It lets us be together while still respecting that we're all still grieving the loss.
Sending you so much love and strength this holiday season.
I'm am only child, and I lost my mother early in life..I definitely can relate to your pain.. After her death any connections to family I'd known vanished..
My family seems to be getting smaller as I get older. Like everyone is moving away or just having their own issues with each other. I am sorry you are going through this. If the seasonal stuff is making you sad, there is no shame in avoiding it and doing something different for yourself.
Don’t feel sad, there’s the family you’re born into and the family you create. My dad is dead, my mom’s family doesn’t get together, and so guess what? I focus on giving my son those special moments. I focus on making sure he doesn’t share my frustration. So understand that you’re now in position to create the life you wanted for yourself, for another person. It may not change your fate immediately but once your family grows and you’re a grandma you will be the matriarch sitting amongst all your children during the holidays. And you will have created a generation in your lineage that doesn’t know the frustration you have.
My grandfather passed on Christmas morning at 1:08am 1996. His last words to me was "Promise me you'll watch over your granny, your mother and your aunts...Then he said you WILL enjoy your gift". Super NES64 with a gang of phucking games I couldnt really enjoy.
My granny passed on 11/17/2021. Someone told her my plan so just like my grandfather she made me promise her to watch over my aunt, She and Young Dolph rode together to the upper room. Ppl said he come tell good jokes so I know he had my granny rollin.
My mother passed on 8/23/2001 and then on 9/11 I lost 2 people my group gamed with at a place called Canter Fitzgerald. This time of year always has me jacked up. I have no siblings and was born in to a family where the colorism mind phucking ran boo koo deep. I have a great wife so I dont think I will be using the MWOK.
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My deepest condolences for all your losses. 🙏🏽❤️🙏🏽
Sincere condolences Sis ..
It can be tough , for anybody, but just know, you are not alone ... All families are not perfect, and the relationships start to disintegrate once the pillar of the family passes away ...
I don't like the holidays bc the real meaning and sentiment tends to get lost, to the point where ppl will get upset over materialistic things ... a 🎄, is that from my oppressors? Everybody has their own opinions, but we definitely need to focus on our relationships during this time ...
Hey, you got virtual family :) Who knows, someone might even organize a family reunion (All Black Conference?) .. I'm just saying, ...
I've been meaning to get more into service for the holidays ... I've gotten away from it, but I remember feeling so good about serving the homeless, maybe even have your little ones choose which gift to give to a child in need ...
I know Kwanzaa is a controversial topic (regardless of the man, the principles are on point, what we need) , but I'm sure there will be multiple events to look forward to ...
I think I might share the link to one of the virtual events during that time ... For me, I feel better when I connect with my roots, hear the healing drum, or whatever that means to you ✊🏾
I agree with this sentiment. I struggle with not celebrating pagan holidays so in my house I institute the Holy days God set apart. None of my blood relatives on my side of the family agree. But I am growing my family and one day ill be the Grandpa with children who only know to celebrate the Holy Days of God.
Sending peace, love, and unity your way
Sis ... I said I would extend invite . Do you celebrate Kwanzaa? If your have time ...