The Cookout

[sourgrapes]

I have seen this online and offline, in my own family, my work life, and in my friend circle. It seems like some people care so much about being liked that they will change themselves in order to please the people around them. Not being true to themselves. I feel like this just sets you up for disaster. Once you decide to start being yourself, people will think you changed. Wouldn't you rather be liked for who you are and not a false sense of your own self? I never understood this. I mean I did it as a teen. I wanted to be liked, have friends, fit in, etc. but I grew out of that.

Why do you think people do this as adults? Do you think there is a psychological reason behind it?

 

[TheHarmattan]

I think it's human nature to want to be liked. The constraints to being liked is too complicated for me. If they could make you like them, that would be an avenue that most people would take so, in the end, many will fake it just to get the feeling of psuedo-admiration...

 

[sourgrapes]

I think it's human nature to want to be liked. The constraints to being liked is too complicated for me. If they could make you like them, that would be an avenue that most people would take so, in the end, many will fake it just to get the feeling of psuedo-admiration...

I guess cause we are social creatures who rely on bonding with others, it is a fault we face often putting ourselves in harm's way just to be liked or appreciated. It is a shame though when you think about it.

 

[TheHarmattan]

I guess cause we are social creatures who rely on bonding with others, it is a fault we face often putting ourselves in harm's way just to be liked or appreciated. It is a shame though when you think about it.

Some connections carry greater enrichment and reward when compared to other connections. Choose wisely.
😎👌

 

[Tati 304]

Some connections carry greater enrichment and reward when compared to other connections. Choose wisely.
😎👌

My dating life in a sentence.

 

[James]

Yes indeed their are so many people who live and behave like they want to impress and they want to make impact for surly. Sometime it looks over confidence and make themselves in trouble specially in corporates world.

 

[Deleted member 191]

Because they hate themselves. Their worth and value comes from others validating them, then they'll stay playing confused when that's not enough.

 

[The_Nsurgent]

I have seen this online and offline, in my own family, my work life, and in my friend circle. It seems like some people care so much about being liked that they will change themselves in order to please the people around them. Not being true to themselves. I feel like this just sets you up for disaster. Once you decide to start being yourself, people will think you changed. Wouldn't you rather be liked for who you are and not a false sense of your own self? I never understood this. I mean I did it as a teen. I wanted to be liked, have friends, fit in, etc. but I grew out of that.

Why do you think people do this as adults? Do you think there is a psychological reason behind it?

It's easier to move through life knowing people like you. We naturally let our defenses down when we believe we are liked. if we know we are hated or disliked it forces us to remain defensive most of the time expecting our haters to strike at any moment. However, if you have to act out of your normal character to be liked then there is clearly something more deep-rooted there. It's safe to assume that we all know someone who acted completed outside their normal self for someone they were attracted to or may have been that person. I think these are normal social behaviors that have to be outgrown. But if you're in your mid-20s or older still acting you need to be liked, well... I cant help you. The reason is psychologically rooted to fear, abandonment, or a need to be the center of attention, etc...

 

[Nesut]

We naturally let our defenses down when we believe we are liked. if we know we are hated or disliked it forces us to remain defensive most of the time expecting our haters to strike at any moment.

This brotha just summed up the Black American community on his first post. Pros.

 

[Goldilocks]

Being liked is a smart thing to do generally . Life is easier when people like you. This coming from a person who rubs people the wrong way constantly. Lol

 

[Jay]

Being liked is a smart thing to do generally . Life is easier when people like you. This coming from a person who rubs people the wrong way constantly. Lol

Being liked is good as long as you're being liked for being who you are. Like, if you believe in White Supremacy, there's no way I can't rub you the wrong way and I'm perfectly fine with that. I don't want to be liked by White Supremacists.

 

[Goldilocks]

Being liked is good as long as you're being liked for being who you are. Like, if you believe in White Supremacy, there's no way I can't rub you the wrong way and I'm perfectly fine with that. I don't want to be liked by White Supremacists.

That’s a bit extreme. 😂

 

[Jay]

That’s a bit extreme. 😂

Hahaha sometimes extreme helps the point sink in.

 

[Goldilocks]

Hahaha sometimes extreme helps the point sink in.

Not in this case 😂

 

[Jay]

Not in this case 😂

Well it's 130AM for you so you get a pass.